The Energy We Bring Home

As your workday ends, there is a tendency for you to continue carrying the same energy state when you enter home. Depending on the battle you engaged prior, the unresolved energy could be in the form of pent-up anger, or aloofness, or helplessness. When you harbour anger, you would appear to be intimidating; when you are aloof, you would choose to ignore and hide away; and when you feel helpless, you would start to find fault with others. Even if you don’t utter a word, the energy can still be felt by your family. 

I recall that my son has always been throwing tantrum since young, and I have conveniently attributed that to his ‘natural personality’. However, my spouse has been brilliant (as always) in pointing out, “He is exactly a mold of you!” When I delve more into the study of psychology, I come across the term ‘projection’ and ‘introjection’ that are used to explain this situation. Because of the subtle anger energy I carry home with me after a stressful day, I unknowingly project that to my son, of which a preverbal child will openly absorb everything, introject in his energy field and assume those emotions or qualities belonging to him. This is a child’s way of getting love identification from his parents, through vibrating at the same energy level. Therefore, subconsciously my son becomes my mirror. 

A good friend once shared, all you need to do is to remember to turn on your most authentic, loving “daddy mode” or “mummy mode”. It can simply be this (or any improvisation you like): take a deep breath, recall a beautiful memory with the family or look at your family photo, before you step back in. You have to realise that there are some things that only you can do for your parents, your spouse or partner, or your children. Those are the sustenance energy for the relationship, and if you do not play heed to it, the relationship will be starved. Always choose to show up as a lover, protector, worshipper before entering home. 

This blog is adapted from the book How Are You Doing Today?